School =-/

Today was bad =( Friends got in a fight. I cried horrible bad. I just feel so numb. I hate it here. I want to leave so bad. Hopefully I'm going to homeschooling after my exhibition. I use to love it here but now I dread coming here. Like people say don't judge a book by its cover dam I'm judging by the pages. I'm so fucking done with this school. Fuck the good program, I'm not gonna be dragged down like middle school. They can go die and I will dance on its grave. I hate it here. I want to leave so bad. I HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE IT HERE!!!!!!!!!Plus with all the bitches dosen't help either. I cant wait to end it with my saphire gin. I'm tierd of being scared here and feeling unsafe, but no parents dont give a fuck. Plus a bitch lost my ipod and so my safety net is gone. I NEED TO LEAVE!!!!!!!!I'm so depressed here. I have to leave or I'm going to end back in the hospital, but I do need it.



Will update soon =) happy weekend (hopefully)

October 4-9, 2009

Today was okay, but I just can't seem to erase things from my mind. I got beat up at school. I'm feeling iscolated more. I'm still cutting. Been drinking more. We won our score board proposal for swim team. Anywas what happened this week was just un forgivable. everyone is trying to start something me and Anthony, but I dont like him. He is just my friend. Right now I just need his support aslong as with Heather's. I'm so tierd of hearing people say "I love you" because it's never true. How can I beleive it? I can go sit in a corner and cry and no one would notice or care. I can cut myself and no one would care. After exhibition I'm probably going to the mental hospital for a while. =-/ So my whole advisory from freshman to sophnmore hate me